Who Are You Really?

A very close friend of mine, shared with me last week about how she was struggling with some of her best friends. Every time she is around them, the only thing they talked about was people and everyone else’s faults. She said how it just feels like poison in her body after she was around them because of how negative everything was.

Girls, what you talk about, is who you are. If you talk about shallow things, chances are, you are shallow. If all you talk about is other people’s faults, what is that saying about who you are? It screams that you really don’t have much depth. If you are confident in who you are, why can’t you accept who everyone else is?

Just a side note, I used to think this was just a ‘high school’ problem, but I think most of us can agree, that is just not the case. Go to lunch with an old friend, listen to what the people you work with talk about, pay attention to the conversations taking place among the parents at your children’s little league games, and unfortunately, listen to the conversations that are going on in your church. It is still an issue even for grown women. I think it reveals the truth about many of us…

We are insecure.

The way we try to feel better about ourselves…we put everyone else down.

A couple of weeks ago, Mrs. Pat Johns spoke to our CCA ladies about the “Be Attitudes” or “Attitudes we should Be” in Matthew 5.

"God blesses those who realize their need for him, for the Kingdom of Heaven is given to them.
God blesses those who mourn, for they will be comforted.
God blesses those who are gentle and lowly, for the whole earth will belong to them.
God blesses those who are hungry and thirsty for justice, for they will receive it in full.
God blesses those who are merciful, for they will be shown mercy.
God blesses those whose hearts are pure, for they will see God.
God blesses those who work for peace, for they will be called the children of God.
God blesses those who are persecuted because they live for God,

for the Kingdom of Heaven is theirs.”

When we are pointing our other people’s faults or gossiping, we are ignoring every one of these attitudes.

Think back on the last conversation you had that you feel may have been gossiping. Were you being humble when you spoke those things? Meek? Is that an example of you hungering and thirsting after righteousness? Were you showing mercy? Were you being a peacemaker?

The last beatitude (vs 10) talks about us being persecuted because of our pursuit of righteousness. My friend I was telling you about earlier, shared with me how her friends now don’t call her to hang out anymore. She said they rarely even speak to her in public. This is a natural response for the majority of the world. The pursuit of God makes people uncomfortable if they aren’t in that pursuit themselves. In verse 11 & 12 it says:

"God blesses you when you are mocked and persecuted and lied about because you are my followers. Be happy about it! Be very glad! For a great reward awaits you in heaven. And remember, the ancient prophets were persecuted, too.”

Instead of grieving for those lost friendships, put that energy into praying for God to send you a mature, godly friend. Pray for those friends to be convicted as well. But more importantly, learn to receive your satisfaction from the most important relationship of all in your life, your relationship with God.

But this doesn’t mean that we are better than those friends we have separated ourselves from, or should we cut ourselves off completely from that relationship. I have known parents that want their children to go to Christian schools, have all Christian friends, they want their families to go to Christian medical doctors, Christian restaurants, and only associate with Christian people in the community. But read on to what verse 13-17 says,

"You are the salt of the earth. But what good is salt if it has lost its flavor? Can you make it useful again? It will be thrown out and trampled underfoot as worthless. You are the light of the world--like a city on a mountain, glowing in the night for all to see. Don't hide your light under a basket! Instead, put it on a stand and let it shine for all. In the same way, let your good deeds shine out for all to see, so that everyone will praise your heavenly Father.”

I am not condoning that you should run wild with questionable characters, or disobey your parents, but if we live in a cocoon of “Christian” people and places, how is our light shining. It looks more like we are hiding or ‘protecting’ it. We need to let our actions, our character, and the way we treat and love people be the light that points to our Father in Heaven.

So may we start to love people, everywhere, in all walks of life. May we begin to break down the walls of superiority in ourselves and begin to be humble, meek, and begin to hunger and thirst after righteousness, so that our light will be like that shining on a hill.

That SO Does Not Apply to ME!

Ever had those moments? You’re listening to a message or sermon, and you stop listening because it doesn’t apply to you. You assume the message is just not for you that day. Attempting not to waste precious time on non-necessary messages, you move on to other important things, such as writing your To Do list, or your grocery list, in the margin of your sermon notes.

I had one a few weeks ago.

Our Pastor was speaking on “Renewing the Romance,” not with our spouses, but with our Creator. It was a great message, I’ve heard it several times, and even have the CD. But for some reason that day, I didn’t relate. Pastor Mark was talking about how we pray and pray for God to give us blessings, such as a big raise, promotion, new(bigger, different) car, new house, etc. and we just don’t understand why God doesn’t give them to us. He went on to say that sometimes the reason God says no is because granting such a request would simply fuel the affair we are having with the mistress called; our new car, bigger house, etc. God should be our first love, and when we put anything before God, that is like us having an affair.

I immediately surmised, “That doesn’t apply to me, because I am simply not that materialistic. Nice things are great, but I am happy with my job, our finances are decently stable, and I don’t care what I drive, or where I live right now.” So I continued making out my schedule for the week... busy, busy, busy.
The message continued on for a little while longer, and I could tell he was winding down the message, so I folded up my notebook and started to move to the back of the auditorium so that I could finish off my duties as service manager. Right when I stood up, Pastor Mark repeated the comment about us having affairs just as he did earlier. But this time, as I thought in the back of my mind, “Still not me…!” In a split second, a thought from out of nowhere, from outside of my own thoughts, was deposited into my brain and hit me in the face.

Now before I tell you what the thought was, let me first give you some background information. I have a wonderful husband. He is incredible to me, more than I deserve. He is an amazing man in every way…almost. But Ladies, let’s be real, even though our husbands maybe be as close to perfection as any human can get, they still have some work to do. I had recently really been praying that God would make Jay into the romantic, love -machine man I dreamed of marrying as a young girl. I needed to be swept off my feet at least 2-3 times a day; I really didn’t think that was too much to ask.

Now, back to the deposited thought into my brain, which I have no doubt came straight from God himself…

I may not be worried about what I drive or where I live, but the affair I was having was with my own husband. I already have more than a little tendency to put Jay before God; so why would God answer my prayer to make Jay even more amazing, and then I would depend on him more to fulfill me, instead of depending on the true lover of my soul, Jesus. If that prayer was answered it would only fuel my affair and take my dependence off of God.

Now, let me tell you something, this may not be some huge revelation to some of you, but this was incredible to me, I can’t fully describe the moment. There is no way I thought this thought on my own. It was completely deposited in my brain like a box that I just had to open. I know God spoke to me that Sunday, so I listened.
I say all that to say this, careful when you start to think something doesn’t apply to you, that you have already superseded that point in your life, because that probably is a symptom of pride, I know it was with me.

We must always depend on God for our fulfillment, not our husbands, children, friends, job, or even our ministries. Why would God bless something that we are putting in front of him?

So today, may you take time out of your day, to cultivate your love life with your Creator. And just maybe, He will sweep you off your feet and give you a box to open…